Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Feeling Good today!!

Well, today is a great day. When D woke me up, I was having a horrible dream, so even though I am NOT a morning person, I was glad to wake up. So I got up took a shower and got the day rolling. I ran my few errands and was home by 9 a.m. Now, I am having the battle of whether or not to clean, go do some stuff in the yard, or be lazy!! It's so beautiful out that I don't want to waste the day. I signed the kids up for playgrounds yesterday. They start the very next day after their last day of school! I can't wait to open the pool!! I went to Gateway yesterday to sell a book back and I had to call my mom to remind me again that I cannot do school right now! I feel like, well like I should be able to handle it. Yet, my reality is that right now, I know w/o a doubt that God has me told me my #1 job is to be a mom. I am in the process of dealing w/ my own mental/emotional issues. I don't necessarily like that I need professional counseling, but I am not too proud to do what I need to do so I can feel better and be what I need to be for my family. So that has to be my focus. I don't want the drama, the ups and downs of anxiety and panic..I want to feel good and deal w/ circumstances in a healthy way. So if that means I can't finish school right now, than I have to trust that God will show when it will be time to go back and finish.
On a different note, I am CRAVING some excitement in my life.. different scenery, something fun, something DIFFERENT!!! Maybe w/ spring finally being here, I am just still having the residual affects of cabin fever.. however I just want to do something fun and different. I don't know what, lol.. I have my curtains pulled back, Rascall Flatts playing in the background...feels good to feel good!!!