Friday, August 14, 2009

Wisconsin Dells

We are in the Dells. Isaiah's in the hospital. At first, I wasn't going to come with. I figured I'd stay home, I could use my mom's car and go visit Isaiah and just stay home. However, today for instance, I could have only spent 45 min w/ him, that's the visiting time for weekdays. Tomorrow is 2 hrs, and we've found in the past that 2 hours is too long. He starts getting ansty, whiny, crabby, asking for snacks, which I have no control over getting him, there isn't really any where we can go with him. So I only spend an hour at the most w/ him. So..to give myself a break, I came with. I'm so glad I did. THe entire Hoaglund Clan is here, taking over the Wilderness, lol.. I feel bad a bit because after the week I had, I am literally exhausted in every way. Darnell let me sleep, he took the kids for dinner and I'll probably sleep in in the morning. The last time we came to the Wilderness was right after Isaiah was discharged from his first hospital stay. THat week I felt the same as I do now, exhausted, drained, etc..but happy to be away. So it's a bit of a balancing act to get some rest and relaxation in and have fun w/ everyone else. In the end, Isaiah sounded good today. Jeremiah, Haley and Savannah are having a blast. The upside to this trip is, we don't have to worry about Isaiah having a fit, everything being a big deal etc...I know this is all happening for a reason. Today, I am ok w/ it I guess. We dropped Isaiah's clothes off this morning on our way out and I cried and cried after we left. There are just so many emotions that go w/ all this. One minute I feel calm, cool and collected, the next I see a little boy w/ the same swim trunks Isaiah wore last summer and it made me want to cry. The emotions of of a mom I guess are unpredictable..God is good. That I have to constantly remind myself. I truly believe this weekend came at just the right time. We all needed a break, some FUN, and Isaiah is safe. At this point his safety his a priority! Well I am off to relax!!!!!!!!!!!